Uma and her husband met at work and began living together a short while afterwards. Married for two years, Uma realised that the relationship would not be life-long, separated and involved lawyers to process the divorce and end the financial claims. Her husband avoided involvement, hoping for a change of mind. They had no joint assets, children or mortgages.
What I wish I had known:
I think my process was fairly simple as we had no joint assets, children, mortgages, bank accounts etc. It was a simple paper process that I understood as it was explained well. I didn’t really have any surprises along the way that I had wished I had known about.
The low point:
The low point was when my then husband decided he no longer wanted to contribute financially, and decided also to be difficult and slow in responding to things which dragged out the process. It had initially been quite amicable, but I think I had maybe a naïve outlook that it would stay that way. As it got more real, he got more difficult. This also was a low point because the reality of it then hit me that I had failed at something, and that upset me for a while. But I had good people around me who were there when I needed them, and although I do still have the feeling that I failed at this, in the overall grand scheme of things it was just another learning experience that has made me much more aware of what I want from life.
The certainty that I did the right thing:
I never doubted this from day one. And the absolute joy when my final papers came through were a huge weight off my shoulders which meant I could finally reclaim my old life and old personality back.
One thing I would do differently:
I wouldn’t do anything differently. It was all explained to me step by step along the way. I understood what was happening and each process was made simple.